Our hearts are heavy this week as we process the impact of a horrific and deeply unsettling event that took place in our beloved Boulder community. When violence strikes close to home, especially in places we know and love, it can shake our sense of safety and bring up big emotions for kids and adults alike.
As parents, caregivers, and neighbors, many of us are wondering how to navigate these conversations with our children. How do we explain the unexplainable? How do we reassure them when we’re still feeling rattled ourselves?
You are not alone in this. Below, we’ve gathered some helpful tools and trusted resources to support you in having age-appropriate, honest, and comforting conversations with your kids. Whether they’re asking tough questions, showing signs of anxiety, or simply sensing the emotional shift in the adults around them, your steady presence and thoughtful words can make all the difference.
We are Boulder. We are strong, we are compassionate, and we take care of each other. We stand together in times of grief and uncertainty.
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Tips for Talking to Children About Scary News
- Start the Conversation, Even If You Don’t Have the Words Yet
It’s tempting to stay quiet, especially if your child hasn’t brought it up. But even little ones pick up on shifts in energy. They may have heard a snippet from the TV or sensed the sadness in your voice. You don’t need a script. A simple, “Have you heard anything that made you feel worried or confused?” can open the door. Listen first. Let their questions guide your response. - Be Honest but Gentle with the Truth
Our kids look to us to make sense of the world, but that doesn’t mean they need every detail. Think about what they need to know to feel secure. A young child might just need to hear, “Something really sad happened in our community, and adults are working hard to keep everyone safe.” Older kids may want more context. Follow their lead, and don’t be afraid to say, “I don’t know, but we can figure it out together.” - Protect Their Peace When You Can
Screens bring everything into our living rooms and sometimes into our children’s hands. Even well-meaning coverage can be far too intense. Turn off the background news. Keep graphic images away from little eyes. If your child is online, check in about what they’re seeing and hearing. Reassure them that they can always come to you with questions. - Let Them Know They Are Safe, and Surrounded by Helpers
Remind your kids that scary things are rare but that when something like this does happen, there are people who rush in to help. It brings kids comfort to know that the grown-ups around them (police officers, firefighters, teachers, and even parents) are working hard to keep them safe. Tell them about the helpers. Point out the community care and the ways people show up for one another. - Stick With the Little Things That Feel Normal
Routine is more than just structure... It’s comfort. The bedtime stories, the breakfast routines, the silly songs in the car - they matter. They remind kids that their world still makes sense, and that the people they love are still here, doing the things they always do. - Make Room for Big Feelings (and All the Small Ones, Too)
Grief, fear, and confusion are all valid responses. Some kids may want to talk. Others may act out. Some may say nothing at all. Let them draw, play, ask questions, or just cuddle close. You might say, “It’s okay to feel whatever you’re feeling. I’m here with you.” That alone is powerful and reassures them that you're a safe space. - Show Them What Coping Looks Like
You don’t have to pretend to be okay if you’re not. In fact, showing your own process, “I’m feeling sad too, so I’m taking deep breaths,” or “I called a friend to talk about how I’m feeling” gives your child a blueprint. They learn that emotions aren’t something to hide, but something we move through together. - You’re Doing Enough
If you’re reading this, it means you care. And that’s what your child needs most: your love, your presence, your effort. Be kind to yourself in this moment, too.
Additional Resources
For more helpful ideas on navigating hard conversations with kids, check out this wonderful article from our Lakewood-area publisher (shared with permission):
Tips on Talking to Your Children About Scary Events
Resources for Further Support
- NPR's Guide: When the News Is Scary: What to Say to Kids
- Child Mind Institute: Helping Children Cope With Frightening News
- Boulder Community Mental Health Resources: Community Mental Health Resources for Traumatic Events, Disasters and More
- City of Boulder Mental Health Resources for Teens: Teen Mental Health Resources
- More Macaroni KID Articles:
Our Boulder community is strong. But even the strongest among us can feel shaken when something so senseless and heartbreaking happens close to home. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, uncertain about how to support your kids, or just emotionally drained you’re not alone. We’re all navigating this together.
Please give yourself permission to feel, to pause, to hold your little ones a bit tighter. And remember that our children don’t need us to be perfect, they just need us to be present.
As always, Macaroni KID is here to uplift and support local families. Whether you're looking for tools to help your kids process big emotions or simply need to see that others are walking this same road with you. We’re in it together.
